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| Thursday, September 4th, 2008 at 10:02:02 PM #4345 |
| DarkestAngel Removed Account | Your idea of Chicken Pot Pie has nothing to do with a pie and you can't figure out why people might think it would. Your driving lessons involved learning to avoid horse droppings. You know at least 5 euphemisms for animal manure and at least 4 of them involve food. You know how to cook, but not without butter. The only spices in your kitchen are salt, pepper and ketchup. You've ever missed school for the first day of deer season . . . . . . but didn't get in trouble. The following words mean something to you: Fire Hall Wedding Chicken and Waffle Dinner Fire-police Wooly Bear Whoopie Pie You spend at least 30 minutes every summer day complaining about New Jersey drivers. You don't understand why people would ever want to see the Amish. The local Post Office used to be a single-family home and they close between noon and 1 for lunch. You have ever ended a sentence with "a while". You do not giggle when you see the following signs: Lititz Intercourse Blue Ball Bird-in-Hand Mount Joy Paradise Peach Bottom Schuylkill You've heard of 7-11 but you've never seen one. You cannot buy beer and wine from the same store. Park City has nothing to do with skiing for you. Agnes 1972 means something to you and you can tell stories about it. You pronounce Lancaster in "Burt Lancaster" differently from Lancaster in "Lancaster, PA". And you giggle at people who say "Aee-mish". You personally know many people with the name: Lapp Lantz Stoltzfus (or Stoltzfoos) Zimmerman Zook Fisher (or Fischer) Miller Your iced tea is sweeter than Pepsi. You know someone who repairs gasoline-powered lawn mowers, but is forbidden to own one. You think Fasnacht Day and Groundhog Day are national holidays. You know that eggs come in either white or brown . . . . . . and you have a preference. You think the Mississippi is just a tad wider than the Susquehanna. You know who James Buchanan was. You can pronounce "Ephrata" . . . and "Strasburg." You don't have to be told what Shoo Fly Pie is. You outen the lights at the end of the day. You go to the store when the milk is "all". You think orange traffic cones are the natural foliage surrounding Route 30. A "Bud" is not a beer and it's much better than those cheap knockoffs, Hershey's kisses. If they hadn't improved the highway, the trip from Lititz to Park City wouldn't be as long. The word "red" is a verb. "Come with?" is a complete sentence. You know what Donkey baseball is. You are a manure connoisseur. You can tell just by smell, whether it is cow, pig, chicken or turkey and if it's from a pile or liquid pit. You know what a liquid pit is. At times, you utter things like, "Throw the cow over the fence some hay." It may be raining, but the question is: "Is it makin' down?" or "Is it really makin' down?" The verb "to be" is useless: "Does Fido need out?" You remember when Park City Mall had a flea market in the basement. Or worse yet, a skating rink. You know that "long johns" are something you eat, not something you wear. You own quilts and know their names. You know what a Turkey Hill is . . . . . . and you've ditched school to hang out there. . . . and they're the only place that sells your favorite beverage. You've corrected all the errors while watching Witness. Rush hour is on Saturday afternoon -- in the summer. Scrapple -- You love it. And yet you know what's in it. "Dinner" and "supper" are different concepts entirely. Your wan has vindshield vipers (and so does your station vagon). You reocognize "Twin Kiss" and "Freez and Frizz," knowing that Dairy Queen is a pale imitation. The outhouse at the end of the cornfield isn't, but it has a phone and a fax. Dutch Wonderland is neither Dutch nor much of a Wonderland. You have a craving for ice cream . . . . . . when it snows. You know "doplic" is indeed a word and nobody can tell you any different. WGAL is the source of all local celebrities and they create quite a stir when they shop in the supermarket. You go out of state just to drive on smooth roads. You've ordered "dippy eggs" for breakfast. The Green Dragon ain't no Chinese restaurant. You know people who don't have cable television in the house, but do have it in their barn. Three words: Red Beet Eggs. You see no contradiction in the fact that "Manheim" is a township that is completely different from "Manheim Township". Bacon drippings are an ingredient for making salad dressing. You think tourist attractions consist of a pretzel factory, a chocolate factory and an Amish family out for a drive. You display electric candles in your windows year-round. You know where and when to find the world's second-largest chicken barbecue. You have eaten a "yellow meal": yellow chicken, yellow gravy, yellow potato, yellow corn, yellow roll, yellow butter and yellow salad dressing. You buy vegetables from an unattended roadside stand with an "honor box." And you always leave more than the price because you don't have correct change. You know what "chow chow" is. You call Route 30 "the bypass". Your kids get "rootchy" rather than sit still for too long. |